As we
approach Mother’s Day here in the UK, we’re busily selecting appropriate cards
and bouquets and possibly planning little treats for our mothers, perhaps
pausing to recall a few treasured childhood memories along the way.
We always
invite my mother and mother-in-law for a meal on Mothering Sunday as well as
presenting them with small gifts, this year being no exception.
However,
when I asked my mum a couple of weeks ago whether she would like to come for
Sunday Lunch on the allotted day, we had rather a different kind of
conversation. We covered all the usual ground about when the date was, what
time she would come, that yes we would be picking her up and so on, but her
burning question was, “Do I need to buy something for my mum?” Followed some
moments later by, “Do I have a mum?”
You see my
mum is in her eighties and has dementia. Some days our conversations run
smoothly, other times they’re fraught with heartrending questions and difficult
explanations, but we get through.
Diagnosed a
couple of years ago after rather a battle for a referral to a memory clinic,
mum’s decline has been thankfully slowed down by medication and some input from
the clinic. Although there are obviously still some tough times that can be distressing
for us all.
But what
has been a big help is the opening of a day centre for dementia sufferers just
around the corner from where my mother lives, which is run by Age UK. After
initial reluctance, counteracted by constant encouragement, my mum started to
attend the centre last summer. In no time at all she began to really enjoy her
weekly visit and it has improved her mental state somewhat too. On her most
recent dementia check, her score had actually improved – the additional
stimulation has certainly proved good for her.
Each week,
mum looks forward to a chat with others who in her own words, “Are just like me
so I don’t feel silly”, the opportunity to take part in activities and a
freshly cooked lunch. It’s been really good for her.
To others
with relatives suffering from dementia I would say do encourage them to attend
a similar centre if there is one nearby. The effects can be very beneficial.
To read
more about Age UK or offer your support, visit www.ageuk.org.uk
No comments:
Post a Comment